you know during the course of our life, some days are like living nightmares. like the day before you get executed, or the day you fail that paper that you'd expect an A+ grade for.
or like the day your love one just died.
you get the idea.
today was that, and at least ten times worst. no kidding.
I've disappointed the most important person in my life, and I did not realised it.
to learn things the hard way is, really hard.
few things can make me cry for more then once in a day. I cried at least 50 times today.
but nothing hurts me more that I realised I've hurt her. and the signs were there and I ignored it.
our journey of almost 4 years, I took for granted. and to think her dad ask her not to take me for granted. what an ass I am.
I've just got a msg. she's with that bear, that she hinted me for so long and I never bothered. I remembered, but silly stupid me just thought that its such lame to buy a sweet girl sweet little gifts. i'm so de-sensitised to what a love couply thingy should be. what rock and shit, nothing else matters now.
I'm on a mission to go after my life, my universe. No one can stop me now, not even GOD. yes, God, I'm sorry. But I've set my mind and thats to go after my love, that love that I never shower with love, the love that I never ever went after.
No turning back now.
'sniff'
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